Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Bringing me joy: Soccer


I love the adrenaline rush.
I love the aching feet.
I love the bruises.
I love the huffing and puffing of my breath.
I love the pulsing pain in my muscles.
I love the endless pairs of socks streaming through the laundry.
I love the rank smelling boots.
I love the desperate bolt for the shower after practice or a game when you have two players under the same roof.
I love the scrimages that run so much longer than "five more minutes."
I love the passion some people have and some just don't.
I love how it makes me push myself to do better.
I may complain, but I love the pain in my muscles after I've worked my butt off at a practice or game.
I love this sport.
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Friday, September 9, 2011

For the girls

Why talk to me like I'm a dirty ad in magazine? I can hear you. I can see where you're gesturing to. I can see what you're talking about. I am not like that. I am not a playboy bunnie. I am Poppy. I have respect for my body. I ignore and brush off comments that inside make me want to scream. What if you talked to your mother like that? Colossians 3:19 says: "Husbands, love your wives and never treat them harshly."
What if that girl you're treating badly was your future wife and life? I don't think a lot of the guys that disrespect girls would think about that. There are those guys out there that don't talk about girls butts and boobs like they are candy. Those are the keepers. And there is always room for improvement. Always.
No disrespect.
Bless.
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Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Inspiration, hurt, falling, breaking.

Inspiration.
So many sources.
So many different types.
So many possibilities when on the high of inspiration.
You know what? I feel the inspiration right now. At this moment. I feel the inspiration to write and write and write. I need this now. I rely on this blog to vent my feelings. Talking can only get you so far. Writing is an endless river for me to ride. To swim. To sink in. To surface in my time of need.
Right now, I honestly feel like nothing else could go wrong.
Truth is, I'm struggling. So bad am I struggling. I don't know what to do but pray, hope, and have faith that things will be okay.
I feel like "everything will be okay" is the worst thing I've ever heard. Ever. Nothing compares to the pain in someone's voice when they have to say that and they really truly mean it. I feel like I'm slipping into a ditch. A long, dark, deep hole that has a slippery slope. One that it seems impossible to climb back out. But you know what else? Even now, in the most hurt I've felt in my life so far, broken to pieces I know I can do it. I know I can climb and claw and scratch my way out of this abyss. I'm Poppy Baldrige.
I am a strong person.
I believe in the all mighty saving hand of God.
I am a fighter.
I have such great people to lean on.
And at this very moment I lay this huge amount of hurting at God's feet.
I need this.
For myself.
For my friends.
For the people that believe in me. For my family.
Whether we are breaking it thriving, we must look up to God.
That's all.
Bless.
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